I am such a hypocrite when it comes to words. On one hand i preach that they are ineffectual little clumps of letters that are just used to make life a bit more tangible. On the other hand, it seems that these words are the complete basis for all emotions/theories/conjectures that escape the ever-so complex human mind. With words, assuming you've played scribe and actually written things down, you can instantly be thrown into...yes....round feelings. you can leave your present state of being and cover yourself up with things once understood and felt and knew.. Instead of sitting here on your comfy-ish chair in front of your weird computer monitor that makes your face glow here in this dark room, you can take yourself to a place that has no walls. no limitations....only words are familiar now. today has been a day of nostalgia. oh, i hate nostalgia. i loathe it. but.....sometimes i go looking for it. i dont know why and... i shall never know what exactly that driving force behind this crave for nostalgia is. we all have it. i know this at least. i am not the only one whos heart floats...whos eyes ache at the relentless pull of that ineffable series of sentimental thoughts. do not deny. i am curious as to why these feelings exist. should i sit down with them and admire them? build on them? find them a new hiding place? not sure. they visit me when they please, coming and going much like an illusive wind. for the moment i welcome their visits. although they do make me awfully restless. almost make me guilty for just sitting here, reading words. Words! dont you see? they are all just WORDS and look! Look at the sort of things they are capable of provoking in one. perhaps i should correct myself when i say that words are not of high importance because, in reality, ....they are everything. they give life to life that gives life and so on. speaking of.. life is at an interesting place right now. im not immensely esctatic about anything, and im not completely rolled up in a sort of somber trance. i am, for the moment, content. the valley is getting warmer. another summer is stretching its legs. how strange its already been almost a year for the mate and i. I am still amazed at our bond...i think it will always fascinate me. this mate of mine is a source of so many things for me; my companion to traverse the land with.......my partner to question universal anomalies with....my comic relief and my personal anchor all rolled up into one. there are too many connotations for him. He is one i will run in meadows and bound about in endless clearings with. our tails bouncing as paws hit the ground, kicking up new earth under some sort of majestic moonlight.
that is all.